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Mourning During the Counting of Omer- the days between Passover and Shavuot are marked by pain, for during this period twenty-four thousand of Rabbi Akiva’s students died. For this reason, the custom is to observe mourning practices during these weeks - weddings, haircuts, and dancing are all forbidden.
Before addressing the details of these mourning customs, it is worth expanding a bit upon the core of the matter: the reason for the deaths of Rabbi Akiva’s students. The Talmud states: "Rabbi Akiva had twenty-four thousand students and all of them died in one period of time because they did not treat each other with respect. It is taught that they all died between Passover and Shavuot, and that they all suffered bitter deaths" (Yevamot 62b). Another source informs us that after this tragedy Rabbi Akiva raised up additional students, and he said to them, "All of my former students died because they looked jealously upon one another. Make sure not to do as they did.."
Since then, the days of the Omer counting are observed as days of semi-mourning, a period wherein we attempt to improve relations with others.
Counting of the Omer (Hebrew: ספירת העומר, Sefirat HaOmer, sometimes abbreviated as Sefira or the Omer) is an important verbal counting of each of the forty-nine days between the Jewish holidays of Passover and Shavuot as stated in Torah: Leviticus 23:15–16.
This mitzvah ("commandment") derives from the Torah commandment to count forty-nine days beginning from the day on which the Omer, a sacrifice containing an omer-measure of barley, was offered in the Temple in Jerusalem, up until the day before an offering of wheat was brought to the Temple on Shavuot. The Counting of the Omer begins on the second day of Passover (the 16th of Nisan) and ends the day before the holiday of Shavuot, the 'fiftieth day.'
The idea of counting each day represents spiritual preparation and anticipation for the giving of the Torah[1] which was given by God on Mount Sinai at the beginning of the month of Sivan, around the same time as the holiday of Shavuot. The Sefer HaChinuch (published anonymously in 13th-century Spain) states that the Hebrew people were only freed from Egypt at Passover in order to receive the Torah at Sinai, an event which is now celebrated on Shavuot, and to fulfill its laws. Thus the Counting of the Omer demonstrates how much a Hebrew desires to accept the Torah in his own life.
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What is Shlom Bayit?
Shlom bayit, the proper Hebrew pronunciation of shalom bayit, is a key concept in traditional Jewish marriage. Literally meaning peace or harmony in the home, it also refers to any practice or behaviour likely to promote those ends. You might say for example, We tried not to go out separately in the evenings during our first year of marriage for shlom bayit or, I had to give up mud-wrestling when I got married a shlom bayit issue. Shlom bayit is already prominent in rabbinic sources. A midrash marvels at the greatness of shlom bayit for the sake of which even God edited Sarahs words when he relayed them to Abraham. (Sarah had expressed surprise at the news that they would have a child, given that she and Abraham were so old. God tactfully omitted Sarahs reference to her husbands age when He spoke to him.) In the traditional Jewish world, shlom bayit is a project to be continuously worked on, not something to be taken for granted. There are classes and books full of good advice; compliment, praise or thank your spouse x times per day, don't contradict one another in public, talk things through but also push your powers of acceptance to the limit; don't make an issue of every annoying little difference of character, preference and habit; be nice to the in-laws but don't expect very much of them etc. These are things which may be blindingly obvious to old-timers but can save the marriage of young couples starting out.